Sermon Title: "Fear, Doubt, Forgiveness and Peace"
Date: April 11, 2010
Minister:  Rev. Charles Ensley

Lesson:  John 20:19-31

Is it just me, or does it seem like there’s less people here this Sunday than last?  Oh well, maybe the second service will make up for it.  No, wait:  there is no second service this week.

This Sunday is unofficially yet universally known in Christendom as “Low Sunday.”  Attendance is low after the influx of folks attending on Easter.  But have you noticed over the years I’ve never singled out those who might attend only on holidays like Christmas or Easter?  I never make fun of those who think the only flowers we ever have are poinsettias or Easter lilies.  Some call them “CE Christians.”  Rich Ramsey told me he knew a minister who called it “alumni reunion weekend.”  No, I am always glad they come.  It’s more work for your worship leaders, choir and handbell ringers, but we’re glad to offer three Christmas Eve services and two on Easter to accommodate those who wish to attend.  I am happy they are here and able to witness and participate in what we do week after week in our worship of God.  Then there’s the man who came out of the restroom after a recent memorial service and said to me, “This is a nice church for weddings and funerals.”  I thanked him, but resisted saying, “But we do some things on Sunday too.  Why not come back then?”

It is possible that those who come once, twice, three or four times a year get all they need.  They get reminded of what these holy days are about; they get a bit of fuel for the journey.  But does it ever occur to you that it just might be fear that keeps them from coming back?  Fear that they wouldn’t know what to do in the service, or they might fear getting involved.

If so, that fear isn’t original with them.  It struck the hearts of the very first disciples on that first Easter afternoon.  You heard the lesson this morning.  They were locked up behind closed doors.  The same crowd that cried, “Crucify him!  Crucify him!” of Jesus might do the same for them.  They feared for their lives.  And if by the remotest chance they did believe what Mary Magdalene ran ahead to tell them after being greeted by the risen Lord, what did that say about their faithfulness?  They had fallen asleep in the Garden of Gethsemane while Jesus told them to keep watch while he went forth to pray.  Peter denied knowing Jesus three times, just as predicted.  Only one gospel reports them standing off afar during the crucifixion.  And Judas?  He wasn’t the only betrayer.  All had fled in fear.  The other disciple missing was Thomas, who didn’t have the courage to gather with them in the room that afternoon.

Oh, they had reason to fear.  They could be persecuted by those who crucified Jesus.  Violence was the way the Romans kept their power in Judea.  But perhaps their fear was also of Jesus.  If he really where alive, he could come and express his deep disappointment, even anger at them for their disloyalty and desertion.  The Lord they loved was also the Lord they had betrayed.

So there they sat, slumped around the edges of the room behind a securely locked door when what to their wondering amazement should appear but Jesus, standing there in the very midst of them, as large as life.  His first four words to them were, “Peace be with you.”  Probably not at all what they expected.  Where was the disappointment, the condemnation?

Yet if they really knew Jesus, if they had bothered to stay around at the foot of the cross on Friday, they would have heard him in mortal agony pray to God about his crucifiers, “Father, forgive them.  They know not what they do.”

A bishop reports he has a friend who says that for him, this is the main proof of the divinity of Jesus.  He is not like us.  He is divine.  Even from the cross, he forgives.

And in today’s story, the divine forgiveness continues.  Just as Jesus came back from the dead, so Jesus comes back to those who let him down, deserted him, betrayed him, denied him, and resumes the conversation.  Jesus can’t resume the conversation without forgiveness.  So the first word he utters is, “Peace…”  There is no condemnation, no penitence requested or required.  There is none of that.  Only “Peace”—that is to say, “I forgive you.”

I can also imagine that some of the people who dared to attend Easter worship are not here today out of fear.  It was okay to attend worship in the midst of the crowd, but today?  A smaller gathering?  What if somebody finds out about me, about what I’ve done?  Fear.

Or they’d like to come, but they are afraid of what is required.  Are we like Jewish synagogues which charge dues to belong?  If I attend, am I going to have to do something?  Can I just attend without becoming a member?  Even if I join, do I have to serve on some commission or committee?

Fear of the unknown paralyzes us—just like the disciples—into inaction.  It’s a good thing Jesus did show up that afternoon, as well as a repeat performance the next Sunday to allay Thomas’ doubts by showing him his wounded hands and side.  If he hadn’t, I really don’t think those demoralized disciples would have had the gumption to get up and get out and preach the gospel.  But the risen Christ’s very presence assured them of his forgiveness and acceptance of them with one little word:  “Peace.”

We have more than the usual number of church members in the hospital right now.  In one of my visits last week, a member who had read my Easter sermon asked me, “Do you really think that without the resurrection the church wouldn’t exist today?”  I told him I didn’t believe it would.  In another visit, a woman said she was afraid.  Surgery was ahead for her, and there is nothing like fear of the unknown.  But the surgeon came in, sat down in her room, and discussed the two possible approaches he was going take to solve her problem.  As she related this to me, she said, “But now I’m at peace.  I really like the doctor.  I told him I trusted that whatever he chose to do would be the right thing.”

I reminded her in a phone call a few hours before her surgery of Jesus’ words in today’s gospel lesson.  Just as Jesus offered his peace to the disciples, so too was she, a woman of faith, overcome with a sense of peace.

Still others might be afraid to show up at church on an ordinary Sunday like this because of their doubts.  Sure, it’s okay to be hidden, one of 583 on Easter, because no one is going to single you out.  You can enjoy the music, the flowers, the brightly dressed children, the uplifting message.  But if you come again, you have to face your doubts.  You’re not sure you believe all of this.  How do you get answers?  Are there answers?  Is there a place for me here?

For several years, the slogan of the United Church of Christ is “God is still speaking.”  That says it all, not unlike the words of the Pilgrim’s pastor John Robinson as they set sail from England for the New World.  He said to members of his departing congregation:  “The Lord has yet more light and truth to break forth from his holy word.”

No one says you have to have all the answers.  Some of us aren’t even sure of all the questions!  You simply have to come in peace, bringing what you do believe, along with your doubts and fears and sometimes feelings of unworthiness.  You come, and sit, and participate, and do you know what happens?  Your faith grows, little by little.  And you find yourself somewhere on that great faith spectrum represented in this and most every congregation.  Not everyone believes exactly the same thing at the same time.  Some are more sure than others.  I learn something every time I study to prepare a sermon.

And there is no condemnation from God or Jesus about where we are on our faith journey.  I believe we are accepted for where we are at.  When Thomas was unwilling to believe in the resurrection until he actually saw Jesus’ scars, Jesus appeared again a week later.  This time Thomas was gathered with the disciples.  Jesus invited him to put his finger in the wounds in his hands and side.  Jesus said to him, “Do not doubt, but believe.”  Once Thomas confessed his belief, Jesus said to him, “Have you believed because you have seen me?  Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have come to believe.” (John 20:29)

Today, Easter and its message means this for us too.  No matter how you have faltered in your walk with God, no matter your doubts and fears, remember to whom Jesus first appeared in his resurrection, and remember the message he gave to them:  ‘Peace.  I forgive you.  Sisters and brothers, slow to believe, I love you still…’